Talking Texas Signs it’s Summer in Texas
Besides the heat.
- You have to wear sunscreen, in your car.
During the summer, Texans get what we call a drivers tan, where one half of your body is darker than the other. You can get out of the car and be sunburned on one arm, one leg, and one side of your face.
- Anything in your car will burn you.
If you do not crack your windows, first your car is an oven, but then when you get in your car will burn you. After you stop burning your back side with leather seats, the seatbelt burns you, and finally the steering wheel. People like to have remote starts for in the winter, Texans need them for the summer to cool off our mobile ovens.
- Everyone starts complaining about the heat.
During the winter, northerners like to make fun of us for not tolerating the cold, to which we respond, come see us in the summer. Texas in the summer is not a joke, any Texan will tell you it is hot, but we don’t want to hear complaints. We know it is hot and complaining about it will not make it any cooler.
- You can literally cook outside.
When it is hot enough, yes, you really can fry an egg on the sidewalk. You can probably even bake in your car while you are at work.
- Everything melts.
Do not leave anything that can possibly melt in your car, not even for five minutes or you will have a mess. Even the tar on the roads softens and sticks to your tires.
- Parking priorities change.
During the cooler months people park as close to the door as they can but during the summer, the game changes. Texans park in the shade. In the summer, it does not matter how far you have to walk to the store, you park in the shade. You will thank yourself later.
- Texans get creative with keeping cool.
Usually we seek water, but we also break out the box fans, personal fans, swamp coolers, and misters. You can always make a quick ac with a Styrofoam cooler, ice, a fan, and a section of gutter.